The girlfriend and I went out mini-golfing at this halloween themed indoor mini golf course. Admittedly, going on a Saturday afternoon in February was asking for us to be surrounded by children. But both myself and my girlfriend were in a great mood. So, what might normally drive me insane, I was able to handle. That was, until we started golfing.
I am not a parent. Right now, I don't want to be a parent. I'm still figuring out how to take care of myself. However, having been raised by decent parents, I do tend to know a thing or two. Like, for example, when you take your child of 4-6 years of age mini golfing, you better show that kid how to a) hold the club; b) swing the club; c) explain the basic rules of the game; and d) keep them focused; or else you end up with the type of child described in the aforementioned article. The little girl in front of us is going to be one of those fucking kids.
No one showed her how to properly hold/swing the club until the 14th hole. Not mom, not dad, not grandma. By then, she had already held up everyone behind her once due to a five-minute tantrum/cry-fest in which she sat down and refused to move/keep playing. Through the ENTIRE 18 holes, mom and dad kept: a) hitting the ball in the right direction when said little girl (LG) hit in the wrong direction; b) deflecting the ball back on course with their feet; c) forming a "V-Backboard" with their feet around the hole so every time LG hit the ball anywhere near the hole, it went in. That wasn't enough though, because around hole 17, LG threw another tantrum/cry-fest, sat down and refused to move/keep playing for another 5 minutes.
Now, I was a whiney little baby as a child (second-borns usually are). When I didn't do well at things and everyone else did, I would throw hissy-fits and temper tantrums. Any guess what my family did when I did that shit?
NOTHING.
They let me cry my little eyes out and look like a total ass hat in front of every one and didn't pay me no mind. Do you know why they did that? Because when you don't you end up with douchebag wiener kids like in the article at the beginning of this post. Same goes for when you're willing to hold up everyone else's Saturday because you wiener LG can't handle the fact that at the ripe old age of 5 she sucks at mini golfing. Same goes for when, rather than letting the LG make a mistake and deal with the consequences, mommy or daddy comes to the rescue EVERY TIME to save the day, or in this case, the LG's errant fucking putt because no one is willing to show the LG how to play the goddamn game. That LG is going to grow up to be a BG, not a woman, but a Big Girl, who will constantly need "saving" by friends, family, mom, dad, grandma, auntie, uncle, co worker, boyfriend, husband, etc. Because she will have never learned how to deal with her problems and solve them effectively without someone else showing her how.
Did I deduce all of this from 45 minutes of watching this family interact? Yes, I did. Could I be wrong? I fucking hope so. The last thing this world needs are more useless fucking people.
People who are proud of being a spoiled brat should be taken out back and beaten with a fucking garden hose.
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