Top 5 Beers to Drink while watching a Round 1 NHL Playoff Game 7

By the time the NHL Playoffs roll around, the cold weather is much more intermittent than it used to be. Or at least that was the case before this global warming business got started. 85 degrees the first week in March. We need to get that under control.

Anyway, I thought I'd compile a list of the five best beers to drink while watching Game 7 of the first round of the NHL Playoffs, because I can. Here we go:

5. Goose Island Fleur:  Taking in a match-up of finesse versus finesse? Or perhaps a series between two teams who have absolutely no bad blood against each other? This delicate Belgian-style ale is the way to go. Especially if you could care less who wins. Brewed with hibiscus flowers, this divine concoction tastes more like a sweet, fruity wine than it does a beer. Very light bitterness subtly underscores the sweetness. Don't share this. Unless it's with someone who doesn't mind seeing you naked.

4. Orkney Brewery SkullSplitter:  About to witness a blood-bath? Have these two teams spent more time hammering on each other than trying to score goals? This is the beer for the Game 7 that will end with penalty minutes cresting the three-digit mark. Bold isn't quite the word for SkullSplitter. Smash-mouth, maybe. This wee-heavy style beer packs more than enough flavor to match up with the intensity of this bruiser of a game. It's also potent enough to help you forget that even though your team is great at knocking people out, you still need to score goals to win games.

3. Sixpoint Crisp Lager:  If you're actually invested in the outcome and are a true fan of the craft that goes into the game of hockey, this less-potent offering is for you. It will satisfy all of your flavor centers and keep you clear-minded enough to enjoy the entire game, including overtime. Offered up in cans, this beer has a pleasant, albeit slightly bitter taste experience that carries throughout. You won't be able to put them down like one of the traditional adjunct pretend-lagers mass-produced in cesspools of crap, but the can will give you some cover against any of your non-beer-snob friends who like to call you a sissy for drinking fancy beer. Make sure to bounce an empty off their foreheads after they're team loses.

2. Left Hand Brewing Wake Up Dead Stout:  This is the beer to crack open when there are less than thirty seconds left and your team is down by two. Or when there are two periods left and your team is down by five. Basically what I'm saying is, this beer will do an excellent job of distracting you from how awful your team is playing with it's alcohol content, and will taste wonderful while doing so. Robust, full of flavor and character, just like your favorite NHL tough guy.

1. Molson Canadian:  As far as beers go, it's nothing special. And it doesn't have the awesome twin labels anymore. In fact, they haven't for a few years now. But it's Canadian, it's drinkable, and it's usually not too expensive. All of which make it a great companion if you have to supply your beer-swilling, drunkard friends who have gathered at your house to cheer on the team you're rooting against. Assholes.

Always remember, if you drive when you're drunk, you're a dick and no one likes you. So don't do it, especially after drinking these beers and watching hockey.